The Intoxicated Sorcerer

Generic (fantasy) [one page]

Self Published

2020

Complexity: 1

The Intoxicated Sorcerer is a game where you play as a broom that has been accidentally given life by the eponymous intoxicated sorcerer due to a magical accident. Which may not be the strangest premise for a game that I’ve reviewed, but it is certainly up there.

Wizard Cops

Generic (crime, fantasy)
Newstand Press
2015
Complexity: 2

Wizard Cops is a very short game about cops that police wizards, and may also be wizards. It is basically an example of a game, and I’m just going to quote its intention. “ It's only a paragraph long, but it is used as an example how a very small number of rules can create very specific conflicts with controlled resolutions.”
So that’s what we’re working with here, and let’s see if this game can break the curse of games titled Wizard _ _ _ _.

Troika

Join me in Checking out Troika! a game with some weird rules and even weirder content.

Princess Pillowfighter

Medieval (fantasy)
Self Published
2015
Complexity: 2

Well, I’m still in a princess mood, so let’s look at another princess-themed game. Princess Pillowfighter is… pretty much exactly what it sounds like, a game in which princesses resolve issues with one another, often by pillow fighting. Is it more than that? Maybe, but it is most certainly that thing.

Pretty Fairy Princesses

Join me in checking out Pretty Fairy Princesses, a thing that is exactly what it sounds like, tabletop role-playing game about pretty fairy princesses.

Mission: Cupid’s Wings

Unspecified (comedic, fantasy)
Dread Vector
2018
Complexity: 1

You may recall during my review of Revenge of the Turkeys I suggested that I found myself curious if the publisher’s other holiday-themed games were of… let’s just say “similar quality.” So now I find myself looking at Mission: Cupid’s Wings, a Valentine’s Day themed game, where players play as cupids trying to help another cupid named Dreamer who needs to make two creatures fall in love while also being distracted by their own amorous ambitions.

Just Quest

Medieval (fantasy)
Mini Zines
2020
Complexity: basically unplayable

I realized that it’s been 2020 for almost a whole month now and I haven't used a 202X tag yet. So I went to DrivethruRPG and searched for the newest free core rulebooks, and eventually found something that actually was a core rulebook—fun fact: most of the products in the “core rulebook” section are not core rulebooks, because unscrupulous publishes just tag all their products with it so they’ll show up in more searches, and there is no system in place to report publishers who are doing shady stuff like that. Anyway, so I should reasonably be able to review any product in that section as if it were in fact a core rulebook, and would be fair in doing so, which I will now proceed to do.

Santa vs. Santa

Modern (fantasy)
Mystic Ages Publishing
2015
Complexity: 2

Okay, so my last attempt at reviewing a holiday-themed RPG didn’t turn out incredibly well, but just because one thing goes poorly doesn’t mean something similar will go similar poorly right? Alright, yes, I’m being a little sarcastic but honestly in the lawless land of web-published RPGs you can’t know how good or bad something is until you dig into it. Which is precisely what I plan to do here.

The Sailor Moon Role-Playing Game and Resource Book

Join me as I review The Sailor Moon Role-Playing Game and Resource Book, which is exactly what it sounds like, a Sailor Moon reference book with an RPG in it.

Lost in the Fantasy World

Medieval (fantasy)
Old Skull Publishing
2019
Complexity: 1

Lost in the Fantasy World is a role-playing game loosely based on a cartoon, loosely based on a role-playing game. And if that sounds weird, remember that there is a role-playing game unofficially based on an anime, based on a series of novels, based on transcripts of a role-playing game.

Ironclaw

Join me as I review Ironclaw, an anthropomorphic fantasy role-playing game. A game that has something to offer be you furry or fleshy.

Stone Age

Prehistoric (fantasy)
Self Published
2010
Complexity: 4

Stone Age is—unsurprisingly—a prehistoric role-playing game, which is a setting that seems like it would be interesting, but is extremely underutilized. It’s also another 24-hour RPG, which as previously stated I like reviewing because they tend to be short and interesting. For a 24-hour RPG it’s also a bit… let’s just say “ambitious,” and you should keep the time restraint in mind while reading this review because me doing so while writing it would be unfair to other games.

Hogwarts

Hey look another fan-made Harry Potter RPG. Since the official one continues to not exist.

Console

Various (fantasy)
Self Published
2003
Complexity: 4

Console is a game about console RPGs.. I mean, it’s a game intended to be similar to console RPGs, it’s not about the development and/or playing of console RPGs--although that does sound like something I’d be interested in. More or less it’s a Final Fantasy fan game with some extras, and is actually the first in the Console series, followed by Super Console and Console: Handheld--which I have previously reviewed. So let’s set our expectations on fan game and dive in.

Wizard Time

A Roleplaying Game of Arcane Arts

Medieval (fantasy) presumably
Self Published
2018
Complexity: only technically playable

Wizard Time is another one of those one-page RPGs I’m so fond of reviewing because they take very little time to read. Now I’m not entirely sure what I expected from this game, but I can say with a high level of confidence that it absolutely did not deliver. Aw snap, I’m not supposed to tell you the game is bad until the actual review. I’ve gone and killed the suspense.

I should probably warn y’all that this is going to be one of those angry salty reviews, as opposed to of the usual sassy but good-natured ones.

Dungeon Reave

Medieval (fantasy)
New Realms Publishing
2016
Complexity: 4

I came across Dungeon Reave while browsing games and initially thought it didn’t warrant my interest. But then I caught a very important sentence in the description, “Dungeon Reave is closely compatible with Xtraor.” Yes, that Xtraor, the worst game I’ve reviewed and notably one that claims to be “revised” while looking like it hasn’t even been proofread. Well obviously at this point I knew I had to review Dungeon Reave—which also claims to be revised. What mysteries does Dungeon Reave hold, does it bring redemption or further condemnation for the mysterious “J?” Join me and find out. Or not.

Console: Handheld

Medieval (fantasy)
Self Published
2009

Console: Handheld is the third in a series of games intended to recreate the feeling of a CRPG, plus it’s a pocket game, and I’m on a bit of a micro game kick at the moment.
The interesting thing about Console: Handheld is that rather than just being a handheld game based on console RPGs, it a handheld game based on handheld console RPGs; seeming to take the bulk of its influence from the early SaGa—aka Final Fantasy Legend—series. Honestly the influence is so strong that I’m not sure if I should be considering this a SaGa fan game or not.

Lunch Box Heroes

Universal (fantasy)
Chubby Monster Games, Frugal GM
2014
Complexity: 2

I’m starting to feel like maybe I’m specifically targeting games for review that I think will be bad. So here’s what I did: went to DriveThruRPG, searched for free core rule books, generated a random number within the range of total results, selected that number product, and reviewed it.
And fortunately for me, this first foray into randomly-selected content returned Lunch Box Heroes, a mildly delightful, rules-lite, kinda portable RPG.
Now if you’re confused by the concept of a “portable RPG” that’s okay, it’s a stupid term that I made up right now. But what I mean is the game is designed to be played with minimal dedicated resources. Aside from the rules—which can be printed in a 2.75×4.25-inch booklet—is a pencil and coins for randomization—however, I will be referring to the coins as d2s from this point on because it’s my blog and I can do whatever I want.

Barbarians of the Gothic Waste

Medieval (fantasy)
Micro RPG
2016
Complexity: 3

Yes, I am back again after a longer hiatus and ready to review more obscure role-playing games, which, as previously stated, is the general theme of this blog.
Today I will be reviewing Barbarians of the Gothic Waste, a rules-lite pulp barbarian themed sword and sorcery game; or alternatively, one of those random games that you find for free on DriveThruRPG and think “meh I guess I’ll check it out.”
It’s probably worth noting that this is one of only three games published by Micro RPG, all of which were released from March to May 2016. And since that time all traces of Micro RPG and it’s parent publisher WitchWorks Magazine Ltd. seem to have mysteriously disappeared from the internet.
It’s also worth noting that this review is extremely harsh. Like I actually feel a little bad about it. So please remember that these are just my opinions and I have very strong opinions on certain things. Objectively the game is not as bad as I may make it seem.

Eldritch Ass Kicking: The Roleplaying Game

Medieval (fantasy)
Mythic Ages Online
2003
Complexity: 2

Alright, after a short hiatus I’m back with more obscure role-playing game reviews, since that’s kinda the general theme here. Today I will be looking at Eldritch Ass Kicking: The Roleplaying Game—hereafter referred to as EAK because I’m lazy—a game with the interesting hook that everyone are wizards. Yes, an entire game based around crotchety old magic-users and their obsession with obtaining obscenely powerful arcane secrets and treasures. Well I guess hypothetically you could hypothetically play a young amicable wizard dedicated to preventing forest fires or some such thing, but I fail to see the appeal in such an endeavor.

I should mention that there was another edition of this game released in 2004, but I have this version so that’s the one I’m reviewing.